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Passion Play
by Beth Bernobich

Pub. Date: October 2010
Publisher: Tor Books
Format: Paperback, 367pp
Age Range: Adult
Series: Erythandra #1
ISBN-13: 9780765322173

Synopsis from Barnes & Noble

Ilse Zhalina is the daughter of one of Melnek's more prominent merchants. She has lived most of her life surrounded by the trappings of wealth and privilege.  Many would consider hers a happy lot. But there are dark secrets, especially in the best of families. Ilse has learned that for a young woman of her beauty and social station, to be passive and silent is the best way to survive.

When Ilse finally meets the older man she is to marry, she realizes he is far crueler and more deadly than her father could ever be. Ilse chooses to run. This choice will change her life forever. And it will lead her to Raul Kosenmark, master of one of the land's most notorious pleasure houses...and who is, as Ilse discovers, a puppetmaster of a different sort altogether. Ilse discovers a world where every pleasure has a price and there are levels of magic and intrigue she once thought unimaginable. She also finds the other half of her heart.

Jennifer's Review of Passion Play

(This review contains spoilers.)

The most important thing about telling a lie is to make certain its every detail is believable. If, under scrutiny, even a fragment of it breaks down, then the entire lie is exposed. Now, there is no 'lie' bigger than a work of fiction, especially a fantasy novel. Not only have the characters never existed, but their world does not, and has never, existed. But through the magic of suspended disbelief, we readily accept the validity of a novel's fictional world, and view as real and meaningful its characters and their actions, as long as every detail is believable.

Passion Play is two stories in one: the first is very good, the second is average. Story number one features a swiftly moving, well-written, enthralling plot, with a 15 year old girl as the winning protagonist for whom we root and with whom we suffer. So good were these first 100 pages that I had to force myself to put the book down. Unfortunately, after story number two began, I had to force myself to pick the book up.

What destroys Passion Play, where the 'lie' begins to break down, is the male lead, Lord Raul Kosenmark. When we first meet him, he is described as having a very high, feminine voice. Shortly after, we find out that, in order to prove his loyalty so that he might serve on the king's Inner Council, he underwent castration. As an adult. Five minutes of research would have informed the author that castration after puberty does not change the male voice. And since his condition, this error, is brought to the attention of the reader every chapter or two, there is no way to forget that what we are reading is not real.

What's unfortunate is that it is totally unnecessary to the plot. Remove every instance of Raul's eunuchism from the story, and nothing is lost. Return it, and nothing is gained. (In a world of magic, an oath of fidelity could have been enforced magically: One willingly accepts into one's body an infusion of magic that, like a bomb, may be detonated by the king at the first sign of treason.) Furthermore, we learn that Raul’s condition may be reversed through magic, which nullifies the value of that type of oath.

This is not, however, the book's only breakdown. In the last 200+ pages, Ilse, our heroine -- who is 16 now -- becomes the chief confidant and prime counselor to Lord Kosenmark (who is in a life or death struggle to prevent a war and save the kingdom). None of the other, older members of Raul’s inner circle seem to think her youth and inexperience in affairs of state is a problem. Yet this is the same girl who, but days before, was sorely distressed over the teasing and pranks of the mean girls who worked with her in Raul’s kitchen. But perhaps those other characters may be forgiven because, once out of the kitchen, Ilse thinks and behaves like a 25 or 30 year old woman. Since the author seldom mentions her age, the reader must constantly remind herself that Ilse is still a teenager.

After the excitement of the early chapters, the plot in the latter chapters drags to a halt. The most exciting thing that happens is opening the mail and attending the staff meeting afterward. Literally. And daily. Ilse is Raul's secretary (and later, his lover), so she examines all of his correspondence, much of which concerns the intrigues revolving around the “shadow court” he has established. Then she and Raul, and whoever else may be in-house that day, sit around and discuss the content of the letters. Except for one, hard-to-believe battle (Ilse, barely trained in self-defense, defeats two well-armed professional soldiers), the bulk of the action -- battles, murders, the machinations of Khandarr, the evil magician -- takes place off-stage, the reader learning about these things through letters. It is very hard to be concerned about threats to characters you've never met, or to fear a faceless foe. (Khandarr appears once, briefly and ineffectually, when he magically crashes a meeting, looks around ominously – in actuality, checking attendance – and then is shooed away.)

Bernobich's conversations flow easily and naturally, and, in the first part of the book anyway, the characters, even the minor ones, come to life. Her depictions of Ilse's rape and later love-making are tasteful, without undue details or sensationalism. For the most part, her prose is lively and free of cliches, though she frequently exhibits a first novelist's tendency towards verbosity: Raul “vented a sigh” (for 'sighed'); during sword exercises he “made a noncommittal noise” ('grunted'); at dinner, he “made a noise in his throat” (‘cleared his throat’); and early on, we come across the bane of poorly written juvenile fiction (or the pride of melodramatic parody) when Ilse sheds “hot tears”. These are common mistakes of a first-time novelist, and too often, sins of the genre, but the editors should not have allowed them to reach press.

The author mentions in her acknowledgments that it took her “many years to write” the book, that she “fumbled toward the story” she wanted to tell, and that one person advised her where to start, and another where to end, the novel. Passion Play is dedicated to the redoubtable Sherwood Smith who, Bernobich writes, read “draft after draft, giving me feedback on prose and plot and characters.” Toss in the editors she credits with supposedly saving her book from “all kinds of inconsistencies and infelicities”, and it’s clear that many share the blame for its problems.

At the end, when Ilse and Raul agree to separate for safety's sake (a questionable decision that feels contrived), I felt no sorrow, only joy that, for a few pages at least, I could again spend time alone with Ilse. If the sequel concerned only her, I would read it, although given that she and Raul will be miles apart, I fear the plot will once more involve opening endless amounts of mail.

(Review originally published October 22, 2010, on GoodReads.com.)